American Samoa

I remember this place... All those years ago.

I was like a king... and now, I return.

I remember this place... All those years ago.

I was like a king... and now, I return.

American Samoa is a permanently inhabited territory of the United States, with its capital city being Pago Pago. It is said that Michael Bloomberg ran for election here.

History

Back before functional labour laws and high taxes, Bloomberg used to frolick around the Pacific Ocean in a yacht shaped like a swan.

It was white, with a long, slender neck that pirouetted through the air into a goofy head made of 10 hogs.

It cost him $10 million, and he loved it very much.

Back then, the concept of financal papers was as alien to Wall Street as attention spans to a Tik Tok star, having to rely on oral myths passed from person to person. Financial traders sat around campfires, listening to wizen shamans reminiscing about legends of Vandebilt and Rockerfeller personally zapping entire industries into existence with their godly muscles, about the tragic tale of Standard the Oil, who got blasted into 17 different companies after pissing off the president and they cheered when they heard about the duo of Ford and Edison, who reshaped the world and their wallets into their desired image.