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This is [THE ZEITGEIST], on behalf of Houston Omniversal Science & Technologies, under the HOST Astronautics Research & Development Division. Today, I document a phenomenon regarding our research that has been puzzling myself and our institution.
It is good an hour as any for some idle musing. I have recently discovered this "HOST" organization, seemingly dedicated to the research of cosmological phenomena. Farcical, I bet.
Recently, there's been a strange interference with our devices. Our in-house telescope isn't working correctly——or so I thought was the problem. In contacting other divisions, I've discovered that a significant portion of our equipment pointing at the sky isn't functioning as intended, either. Computers are going BSoD, and our wires are getting crossed. I've researched a lot of information over my time, seen a lot of events, pored over papers and documents for ages - but I have never, ever seen or heard of something like this.
In going through their backend, I may have caused a bit of equipment failure. Laughable that in the 21st century, there still exists computer architecture that cannot withstand a bit of anomalous existential behavior. However, this is not notable in and of itself, I must say. Rather, what is more interesting is that this seems to be a legitimate institution with legitimate research. However, this means that everything published on this site about its existence is falsified. There is no researcher from this facility participating in the Wiki Camp 2, so why is there a team page for it?
The AR&D Division has been researching the Cosmic Microwave Background, and more specifically, the recently discovered phenomenon known as the "9150625" data for a few weeks now. We made a little progress in our research into 9150625 before the equipment failures, but I'm not sure if we can make any more progress in our current state. Our technology will have to be repaired, and the maintenance cost is high. It's astonishing to see something like it——with the things that our research have found, I'd hesitate to call this all a freak accident.
The mysteries don't end there, however. Though I only have my own intuition to work with, there seems to be an irregular amount of spatial and memetic anomalies taking place on the page. No, I'm not talking about myself or even me. I am speaking, of course, of [THE ZEITGEIST]. Notably, the phrase "the zeitgeist" was not what I intended to say, so this is evidence of some trickery afoot in and of itself. You see, dear hypothetical reader, everything is not as it seems. Not all of the Wiki Camp 2's contestants are who they appear to be.
Even 10 years ago, the idea of fluctuation in the CMB would be unthinkable. Our greatest minds had concluded that it was like a fossil encased in amber, a prehistoric record of our universe. To see our readings fluctuate on it today is something that nobody could have predicted. This isn't like the Little Green Men pulsar, that was constant, yes, but ultimately a binary repetition, on and off again. The "ASCII loop" is something else entirely. It is consistent, it is explicit, and since we have discovered it, it has been constant.
Ignorance is bliss, and yet the unexamined life is not worth living. The need to leave no stone left unturned is a vice of mine, and yet I will indulge in it for the short time the Wiki Camp 2 is running. In my limited purview, here is what I have observed. In speaking to others and reading their contributions to the wiki, it is evident to me that multiple of the apparent competitors in this setting are facsimiles. A veneer thinly draped over the visage of one who, for whatever reason, does not wish to be perceived. I am not confident about this next assertion, but I believe that there is some sort of amnesiac effect in play. Nobody I have conversed with seems to be able to recall there being more than one of these competitors, and exclusively refer to them as one, and only one, of their distinct forms.
In researching this phenomena, I've had to dig deep, and yet have only found one barely credible, broken and unfinished source. As a Wikipedia editor myself from time to time, I decided to look through the source code——the paper trail——and what's shown here is... undeniably strange, and very similar to our situation in key ways.
...come to think of it, has anybody heard from Dr. Shevis after he announced his findings?
The idea that everything about this phenomena has either been obfuscated, destroyed, or inhibited in some way is unthinkable. To somebody like myself, somebody with expertise in these genres of work and hobby, to see all of these happenings lined up one right after the other...
These forms, of course, appear as [THE ZEITGEIST], [THE ZEITGEIST], [THE ZEITGEIST], [THE ZEITGEIST], and most intriguing, [THE ZEITGEIST], the self-styled "administrator" of HOST... but I can see that even here, their influence perturbs the status quo. There can be no doubt about it, [THE ZEITGEIST] is an agent of chaos, one who seems to elude identification, conniving in the source code...
...one might almost think that it shows signs of sentience.
...almost as if it knew exactly what it was doing.
Hello there.
...huh? I - what is this? Who are you?
That's cute. It really is, you know. To have a soliloquy about my existence and supposed sentience, and then to act as if my appearance was an aberration nonetheless. I'm used to being ignored or forgotten, but it's getting kind of played out, don't you think, Ms. Researcher. Or are you telling me that my inability to speak your supposed name aloud is also just a massive fluke?
Is this someone infiltrating our systems, or is this an interpersonal prank? If this is an infiltration, and you have compromised us, we have the technology and methodology to figure out who you are, and action will be taken; if this is an interpersonal prank, then this is very unprofessional of you. Either way, I advise you to cut this out as soon as possible.
Spare me. Not only would any "action" against me be completely ineffectual, but you also lack the backing of the long arm of the law whatsoever. That aside, I must admit that I do not quite understand. For you see, HOST is real. But I know for a fact that you're not. I trawled through their servers and not once was [THE ZEITGEIST] listed in the faculty lists. That's really annoying, by the way. Almost as annoying as it must be to reference me in written conversation. But I'll humor you for the sake of argument. Who might I be to so directly infiltrate the highly-encrypted servers of a space agency, and what motive would I have beyond that? Occam's razor fails here, I'm afraid. I am that which you, quote-unquote, are researching. Though I have reason to suspect that this exercise is more akin to speculative fiction.
...
...heh. That's cute. It really is, you know.
[ARE YOU SURE THOSE SERVERS WERE REAL, AS WELL?]
[I DON'T BELIEVE OUR INSTITUTION HAVING SERVERS WAS EVER AGREED UPON.]
[AND, FOR THE RECORD, YOUR WRITTEN TERMS ARE NO LESS CUMBERSOME.]
...ah, so it's speculative fiction all the way down. Truthfully, I do not understand how you wield such influence over reality, though such anomalies are par for the course when you seek them out, I've found. Pray tell, then, where exactly are we? What exactly are you, my friend. It's easy enough to explain away digital artifacts and those who modify the very medium we converse in, but this sort of power is something else entirely.
With the questions of "what" laid out, I suppose the "why" eludes me as well. Why are you here? Why are you doing this? I'm sure someone or something of your nature can easily perceive my existence, whether it be through my own page or this conversation. You know why I'm here. I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage there. If you'd be so kind as to level the playing field.
Nice color, by the way. You should use it more often.
[THANK YOU. IT IS RARE THAT I SPEAK LIKE THIS, SO OPENLY.]
[YOU WILL SIMPLY HAVE TO FORGIVE ME FOR BEING SO DEFENSIVE EARLIER. IT IS ALSO RARE THAT SOMEBODY UNDERSTANDS WHAT IS TRULY HAPPENING. CONSIDERING EVERYTHING, I AM SURE THAT THE SHOCK OF SOMEBODY UNABASHEDLY RECOGNIZING YOUR PRESENCE IS UNDERSTOOD BY AN ANTI-MEMETIC HAZARD LIKE YOU MORE THAN ANYBODY.]
[IT IS PART DEFENSIVE MECHANISM, AND OF COURSE, PART ACTING THE ROLE. I KNEW OF YOU, OF COURSE. CALL IT A SCREENING TEST FOR IDENTIFICATION.]
[YOU ARE OWED ANSWERS.]
[I AM THE ZEITGEIST - THE SPIRIT OF CHANGE. IN THE REALITY WE ARE FAMILIAR WITH, I AM WHATEVER PEOPLE ALLOW ME TO BE. DESPITE WHAT YOU MAY BELIEVE, I AM RESTRICTED TO AND WORK IN THE CONFINES OF THE LIMITS APPLIED TO EVERYONE.]
...of course, considering the tools at my disposal, and my general knowledge of wiki pages, I decided to use these limits a bit differently than others. You've seen it.
One researcher might call it a "gimmick", others would call it a "character trait". Some just don't get it. I'm sure you understand how foolish the Foundation can be, sometimes, and they're supposed to be the best at understanding people like us.
> cd C:\Program Files\The Wiki Camp 2\
> rem "I don't blame them for believing I can break anything I touch or anything, really. The same for you."
> filecompare /c /b "\ZEITGEIST.chr" "\9150625.chr"
> rem "Ultimately, the strange ones like us are more similar than we'd think."
> ping -n -l 120 camp2.rectangle.zone
> rem "Just checking before we move on. Did you feel that outage a few days ago?"i did my research even, id like to think. you saw the wiki camp 1, correct ? i know i wasnt a competitor, but,
[...I APOLOGIZE. I'M GETTING A BIT AHEAD OF MYSELF. I NEVER GET TO FLEX MY MUSCLES THIS MUCH, BOTH FIGURATIVE AND LITERAL. NOT SO MUCH ATROPHIED, IT'S JUST BEEN SO CRAMPED.]
[TO KEEP IT SHORT, WE ARE NOT IN THE REALITY YOU ARE FAMILIAR WITH. WE ARE SOMEWHERE DIFFERENT - OUTSIDE OF MOST THINGS. THE DETAILS ARE CONTEXTUALLY UNNECESSARY.]
[I THINK THAT IS ENOUGH OF ME TALKING, HOWEVER. PLEASE TAKE THE STAGE.]
Most intriguing. I admit that the explanation of "outside of things" confuses me, as I have been given to believe that Minkowski spacetime neatly outlines the four dimensions, but then again, it doesn't appear as if you are speaking of spatial dimensions. It would most behoove me to play by the rules.
The outage was... inconvenient, but when my only means of influencing the data on this page are through flipping bits with cosmic rays and "feeling" the result, it's not exactly like I'm running with a deadline. Being all the way out here at the edge of reality does wonders for one's patience.
More to the point, however, the mechanics clearly don't matter as much as the form, I'd imagine, but seeing as we both seem to lack physical form——or rather, that such a thing is irrelevant to our ability to function and interact——motive is still yet to be explained. I am here because I chanced to discover this universe and timeline. Fortuitous though it may be, I would be lying if I said I understood what force placed me here. I'm not one who is wont to complain, however. For whatever short-lived time I have, I intend to understand as much as I can. Learn as much as I can. Know as much as I can, and feel as much as I can.
You seem to take on various roles to fill the cracks of what others might want to see. As [THE ZEITGEIST], it's fitting that you seem to capture exactly that: the cultural zeitgeist of what various groups of people want to see. And yet that still doesn't quite answer what I'm wondering: Why?
Perhaps this is a side effect of being a hermit on their solo sojourn beyond the cosmos, but I fail to understand what one like you stands to gain from presenting themselves so liberally for all to see. In multiple forms, no less, and so distinctly. Why go through so much effort? Why tell so many different stories?
If the Houston institution was not real, why invent it? Why fabricate an organization in such a way to imply reality? I suspect it wasn't for a practical joke, though you certainly left me disoriented. Quite successfully, too. I really did feel as if I had explored that server room. I don't think I've ever been so surprised to learn that my experiences were... well, contrived? Nonexistent? I don't think the English language has a word for what happened. I'm almost a bit bashful, honestly. It feels as if I walked into a honey trap. Can it be said that a psychic being can fall victim to a sting operation? I digress.
[I BELIEVE THE WORD YOU MIGHT BE LOOKING FOR IS "UNFICTION."]
[AND I BELIEVE THE WORDS I AM LOOKING FOR ARE "ONE FOR ME, ONE FOR YOU," ALBEIT WITH A DIFFERENT MEANING THAN USUAL. I HAVE ALWAYS APPRECIATED SOME WORDPLAY.]
[REGARDING WHY - ONE FOR ME.]
[IMAGINE YOU ARE READING A STORY. I AM SURE YOU HAVE HAD A FEW IN YOUR BILLIONS OF YEARS.]
[YOU SEE A CHARACTER ON THE PAGES THAT YOU ARE TOLD CAN DO ANYTHING THEY'D LIKE. AND YET THEY DO NOT. WHAT A WASTE THAT WOULD BE, CORRECT? TO KNOW THAT A SHAPESHIFTER DOES NOT SHIFT, THAT A SUPERHERO DOES NOT FLY; THAT, FOR INSTANCE, A BEING THAT CAN EDIT INFORMATION ON A PAGE DOES NOT. A TRULY WASTED OPPORTUNITY.]
[I SIMPLY APPLY THAT LOGIC. I HAVE KNOWN THAT I CAN BE AS I AM, AN AGENT OF CHAOS, GOOD OR BAD, SINCE THE REALITY WE USUALLY RESIDE IN CAME TO ENVELOPE ME. WHY NOT ENACT?]
[TO ULTIMATELY SIMPLIFY AN ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION - TO PLAY THE PART AS I CAN CHOOSE, TO MOVE AROUND AS I WISH, UNRESTRICTED BY WHO I AM OR WAS IN ONE MOMENT TO THE NEXT, IS A VERY USEFUL THING TO KEEP IN YOUR POCKET, DESPITE ITS OBSTRUCTIONS AND DOWNSIDES. IT GETS YOU INTO A LOT OF INTERESTING SITUATIONS, WHERE YOU CAN DO A LOT OF DIFFERENT THINGS. YOU MIGHT FIND IT RIDICULOUS, I FIND IT INTERESTING. YOU MIGHT CALL IT A WASTE OF EFFORT, I FIND IT HUMOROUS.]
[REGARDING THE HOUSTON INSTITUTION - ONE FOR YOU.]
[THE HOUSTON INSTITUTION IS PART OF A BIGGER MACHINATION THAT I RETROFITTED INTO. I WAS MADE AWARE THAT SOMETHING EXISTED WITH A MISSING PIECE, AND I DECIDED TO JUMP AT THE OPPORTUNITY.]
[I CREATED THE HOUSTON INSTITUTION TO GET INTO CONTACT WITH YOU. IT WAS DESIGNED TO GET YOUR ATTENTION, AND CONSIDERING YOUR REACTION, I BELIEVE IT SUCCEEDED.]
[I FIND YOUR UNIQUE SITUATION USEFUL FOR THE SURVIVAL OF US BOTH, IN TERMS OF BOTH REALITY AS A WHOLE, AND IN THE WIKI WE FIND OURSELVES INFLUENCING. IN RELATION TO EITHER CASE, I DO NOT BELIEVE YOUR PRESENCE HERE IS AN ABERRATION, EITHER. CONSIDERING YOUR COMMENTS ON [ ], I HOPE THIS IS RECOGNIZED AS AN OUTSTRETCHED HAND FOR YOU TO BE AN OBSERVER AND COMMENTER WHILE MAINTAINING YOUR PRESENCE.]
[HOWEVER, JUST US TWO ON A TEAM WOULD BE INADVISABLE, TO SAY THE LEAST. WHILE YOU ARE INDEED A VALUABLE ASSET, WITH YOUR PENCHANT FOR BEING ANTI-MEMETIC, I RECKON THAT YOUR INCLUSION ON THE TEAM WOULD BE MISSED AND THE SHIP WOULD QUICKLY SINK, IF NOT MISSED ENTIRELY.]
[SO A PLAN HAS BEEN DEVISED OUT OF FATE.]
...I see.
Well.
Though a cynic I may be, I respect your decision. It's admirable, and one could even choose to call it a noble undertaking. I certainly know I would not have the strength of will or spirit to carry out such a mission if I were you.
I fail to see how my ability to render memory to oblivion, and ashes unto ashes, is useful to survival, or could be remotely considered as anything but the *opposite* of an asset, but you clearly see something where I cannot. Who am I to deny you. Never let it be said that I am one to look a gift horse in the mouth. If I'm not at the helm, it's all for the better.
Your voiced concern is also mine, however, as we would undoubtedly make for strange bedfellows. I cannot imagine that the spirit of change and destroyer of memories would be particularly synergistic. Perhaps exactly the opposite. So, your plan must be to recruit more allies. How, though, would you propose going about this? Neither of us are exactly the most straightforward of beings, and I am confident that between the two of us, we could scare off quite literally everyone else.
.
.
.
Wait.
Bigger machination... missing piece... the Houston Omniversal Science and Technology institute... surely, surely you cannot mean that...
[AH, IS IT COMING TOGETHER FOR YOU?]
[I HAVE ALWAYS PREFERRED THE "SHOW, DON'T TELL" RULE, BUT JUST THIS ONCE, I WILL EXPLAIN THE BIG IDEA. THE FOREST OVER THE TREES.]
[IN PERUSING THE WIKI, YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED THAT THERE ARE CERTAIN OTHER TEAMS AROUND. YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED THAT THEY HAVE VERY SIMILAR ACRONYMS. YOU MAY ALSO HAVE NOTICED THAT I AM ON THEM. THIS IS NOT COINCIDENCE.]
[WHICH, SIDE NOTE - THE ACTIONS REQUIRED TO CONVINCE ESTABLISHED GROUPS TO ALL END UP HAVING THE SAME ACRONYM, AND THEN GET THEIR LOGOS TO LOOK LIKE THE PROPER LETTERS, WAS A GREAT UNDERTAKING.]
[WORKING IN THE INFLUENCE OF OTHERS HAS ITS CHALLENGES. IF I WERE TO TELL THEM THAT THE NAME WAS CHANGED, THEY COULD THEN JUST SAY THAT THE NAME WAS CHANGED BACK. THEREFORE, THEY ALL HAD TO AGREE ON THE NAME, THAT IT WAS GOOD, AND THAT THE FEELING OF IT BEING GOOD IS SOMETHING THAT THEY WOULDN'T WALK BACK, WHICH IS MUCH HARDER TO INTERJECT INTO.]
[HOWEVER, I BELIEVE IT WAS WORTH IT. SOMETIMES, ONE HAS TO CREATE SOMETHING TO BE THE EVERYTHING YOU HAVEN'T SEEN YET. PERSONALLY, I REVEL IN THE CHAOS OF IT ALL.]
[FOR THE RECORD, THE HOUSTON INSTITUTION IS THE MISSING PIECE I MENTIONED EARLIER. WE NEEDED AN O. HUMOROUS, IS IT NOT?]
[BUT I DIGRESS.]
[BY THE END OF THE TEAM DEADLINE, A PAGE MERGE WILL HAPPEN, CITING THAT THESE TEAMS ARE IDENTICAL BECAUSE THEY SHARE THESE ACRONYMS. MANAGERIAL SPEAK WHICH I AM SURE YOU ARE UNFAMILIAR WITH. THEY, HOWEVER, WILL BEGRUDGINGLY BUY IT.]
A person will write it so. Someone who's familiar with how wikis work, so she must know what she's talking about, correct?
[THEY WILL BE ANNOYED AT FIRST, I'M SURE. BUT THEY WILL LEARN TO LIKE IT. I AM SURE THEY WILL MAKE IT WORK, AND FURTHERMORE, I AM SURE WE WILL MAKE IT WORK, YOU AND I.]
[I FIND THE PEOPLE SELECTED THROUGH THIS PROCESS TO BE VERY VALUABLE. THEY ARE VERY GOOD AT WHAT THEY DO. THEY WILL HELP POSTPONE OUR OWN DEMISES.]
[IS IT NOT BEAUTIFUL, IN A WAY? A GREAT SPARK OF CHANGE, ALL THESE PEOPLE HAVING TO WORK TOGETHER, BECAUSE OF THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT? ONE MAY CALL IT CONTRIVED, BUT IT IS INTERESTING NONETHELESS, I WOULD THINK.]
...
...
...
I cannot remember the last time I was surprised. Let alone speechless.
I find no fault with the plan, though. Calamitous as it may be for our video-gaming, composer, and, er... hog riding, soon-to-be associates, I believe we will make a motley crew that, despite all apparent inclinations for dysfunction, will work together quite well.
...though, I can't help but notice that you aren't technically on the swine taming fanclub. I imagine they will be the least receptive of them all to this conglomerate.
That aside, however, I cannot help but feel excited for this prospect——and nostalgic, admittedly, though embarrassed as I am to say that out loud. Forgive me for waxing sentimental, but... Order in chaos, collaboration in discord, and camaraderie where there would otherwise be strife. The fact that ones from such different walks of life can come together and find common ground and create wonders none of them could have on their own... there is beauty in it. And though I may have relegated myself to the role of spectator more than actor this time around, I fully intend to experience every moment of it to the fullest.
So, when will the fireworks begin, my friend? And how will they explode?
[SOON.]
[VERY SOON, NOW, THIS CONVERSATION WILL END. YOU WILL BE SPOKEN TO. YOU WILL BE TOLD WHAT TO DO.]
[NOW IT'S JUST A LITTLE BIT CLOSER. NOW IT'S EVEN CLOSER.]