[NOT FINISHEDthis is gonna be used for something later maybe idk. it's not canon rn]
( how many seal pages are on the wiki? )
At this time, three hundred and eighty-two.
( what am i thinking right now? )
Most people's exact thoughts aren't expressible through words, but the general idea is that you want to stop thinking.
It didn't work.
( wtf )
( what's the best social media? )
Going off the proportion of users who enjoy using it, you end up with a lot of ties from two or three member sites.
( what's the best social media with over a hundred million users? )
By that same metric, Pinterest.
( okay what's like. actually the best social media, by a not dumb metric. )
I'm partial to Trollslum's time window features.
( oh idk what that one is )
( how many, uh, )
( how many dogs are there in existence? )
Five hundred eighty-nine million, four hundred seventy-three thousand, two hundred and sixteen.
The number went up by one as I said that.
( yo )
( that's a lot! )
...
( what's the last thing i spoke on? )
This page.
( okay, well, what's the last thing i spoke on before this conversation? )
An oak sign in TheBladesSMP Minecraft server.
( what's my name? )
Emoticon.
( but like, what's my REAL name. )
...
Emoticon.
( shoot you're good. )
I am.
But these answers do not demonstrate it well.
All of those could have been from accessible databases, cold reads, or me making up information you have no way of verifying.
( okay, well... )
( why don't you do something that can 100% convince me that you're telling the truth? )
( you should know how to do THAT. )
I would not be able to.
( huh?? )
( why not just, i ask someone to put a blue rock in a box and don't tell you what it is and you tell me it's a blue rock? )
That would convince you more.
But what if I was cheating and took a peek at it, or I was colluding with the person you asked, or I have the innate power to sense blue rocks and number of dogs, or I'm just very lucky with my answers?
There is no situation which could genuinely, totally, one hundred percent convince you.
This isn't an issue in my eyes, by the way.
You, and most people, are not genuinely, totally, one hundred percent convinced that anyone is ever telling the truth.
Functionally, if you're almost certain someone is being truthful, and you act as if they are, there's no real difference.
And you are fairly certain right now of my own truthfulness.
( jeez )
( fair enough??? )
( you know EVERYTHING in the universe. )
I have the potential to know everything in the universe.
( same difference )
( but like, that's, a lot of information? )
It's actually less than you'd expect.
What exists and is true in the universe is very malleable.
It shifts around quite a lot, and the limits of my knowledge shift along with it.
( what do you mean? )
I mean...
It's hard to explain.
( give an example. )
Have you heard of a place called Wikiland?
( nope )
Depending on when I asked you, you might have answered that you and most people you know live there.
The canonicity of any given fact or event or person changes depending on...
Well, a lot of things. Some of which are outside the universe, and therefore, outside of my jurisdiction.
My point is, since I can only know about things which might change, the amount of useful information I have is inherently limited.
( oh jeez )
( that's weird )
( don't see how it matters though )
You're taking the fleeting nature of everything better than I expected.
:P
( who cares if the universe isn't really real? )
( i mean, if i've never noticed it, clearly it doesn't affect me. )
I wish I had your perspective.
( and everything in the universe is still a lot more than i know )
You flatter me.
( really? )
No.
( wow wtf )
( imagine knowing everything and choosing to lie )
( wait )
( you expected me to react worse?? )
Yes?
( if you know everything, shouldn't you know how i react to important things? )
( (general disinterest) )
Like I said above, I have the potential to know everything.
That's different from knowing everything.
( what's the difference? )
Hm.
It's also hard to explain.
( just give another example? )
...
Imagine you're looking at a small picture of a bowl of fruit.
It would be fairly easy for you to answer any detail about the picture upon request.
How many fruits there are, which specific fruits, the amount of red things in the picture, and so on and so forth.
( but you wouldn't be able to tell specific shades or measurements or whatever at a glance! )
It's not a perfect example.
The point is, within a few seconds of attention, you can reasonably find out any specific information about the picture.
But that doesn't mean you can perfectly remember it, or hold the entire painting in your memory, or perfectly replicate it.
And if someone asked you to describe the entire picture in detail, it would take a good bit longer.
Are you following?
( sure )
That's how the entire universe works for me.
I don't know everything about the universe, just as you don't really know everything about the picture.
But I'm able to quickly and easily find out information about any specific part of the universe, just as you can quickly and easily spot any specific detail in the picture.
( alright, well, how do you do that. )
Magic.
( fair enough )
Me gaining knowledge about something requires active thought on my part.
Think of it like me asking the question in my head, and then it pops up.
So, I'm not constantly reading minds.
It would take my consistent attention for something which is both an extreme invasion of privacy and mostly pointless.
Hence, my incorrect expectation of your reaction.
( damn you care about privacy? )
I try.
..
( so like, you know what i am? )
Annoyed at this response?
( stupid )
( WAIT )
( what place do i get in the wiki camp? )
I don't know.
( WHAT )
That's something I should clarify. I know about everything right now, but not the future.
( okay, well, can't you just know everything about the camp and then simulate it? )
Can't you just know everything about the fruit picture and predict which fruit will be photographed next?
Actually, that's a bad example.
But I can't simulate events in my head any better than you can.
I could build a perfect simulation machine and feed it in every tiny bit of required information, but that would take a lot longer than you probably have.
( dang )
( well what place do you think i'll get in the wiki camp? )
At that point, you're just asking for my opinion.
( what's your opinion )
I'm sure you can win if you apply yourself and work hard.
( what if i don't wanna do that )
Then you won't get a job and you'll become homeless.