Steamed Hams but Statler and Waldorf commentate over it
Skinner runs to the kitchen, only to find his roast is burnt.
Well, Seymour, I made it, despite your directions.
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Ah, Superintendent Chalmers, welcome. I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon!
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Unforgettable? What's so unforgettable about a luncheon?
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I forgot everything that happened at my last lunch, but my stomach sure didn't!
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Oh ho ho ho!
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Yeah.
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GASP!
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Oh, ye Gods! My roast is ruined! But what if I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Hohoho, Delightfully devilish, Seymour!
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Are you kidding? That'll never work!
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What are you talking about? It worked on you before!
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Oh ho ho ho!
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He begins to climb through the window, but Chalmers enters the kitchen.
SKINNER, WITH HIS CRAZY EXPLANATIONS, THE SUPERINTENDENTS GONNA NEED SOME MEDICATION, WHEN HE HEARS SKINNER'S LAME EXAGGERATIONS, THERE'LL BE TROUBLE IN TOWN TONIGHT!
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SEYYYYMOUUURR!!!!!
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What was that?
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I think that was the intro.
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Intro? I thought it was almost over!
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Oh ho ho ho!
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SUPERINTENDENT! I was just...uh...stretching my calves on the windowsill! Isometric exercise, care to join me?
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Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?
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Uh, ooh, that isn't smoke! It's STEAM! Steam from the steamed clams we're having. MMM! Steamed clams!
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Chalmers leaves the kitchen.
Whew.
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Skinner leaves out the window and orders burgers and fries, and returns back to the house.
Superintendent, I hope you're ready for some mouthwatering hamburgers!
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I thought we we're having steamed clams.
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Oh no, I said "steamed hams" that's what I call hamburgers.
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You call hamburgers "steamed hams"?
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Yes! It's a regional dialect.
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Uh-huh. What region?
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Uhhhhpstate New York.
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Really. Well I'm from Utica and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams"
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Oh, not in Utica, no. It's an Albany expression.
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I see.
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Chalmers takes a bite out of his burger, and then inspects it.
You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger.
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Hohoho, no! Patented Skinner Burgers! Oooold family recipe!
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...For steamed hams.
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Yes!
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Yes, and you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they're obviously grilled.
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Y- Uh. You know, th-
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One thing I should-
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...Excuse me for one second.
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Of course.
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Skinner enters the kitchen and then immediately leaves upon noticing the kitchen is burning.
(YAWN!) Well, that was wonderful! Good time was had by all, I'm pooped!
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Yes, I should be-
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GOOD LORD, WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE???
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A-
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AURORA BOREALIS?!??!?
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AT THIS TIME OF YEAR??
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AT THIS TIME OF DAY???
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LOCALIZED ENTIRELY WITHIN YOUR KITCHEN??!?
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Yes!
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...May I see it?
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No.
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Skinner and Chalmers exit the house.
SEYMOUR! THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!
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No, Bloomberg, It's just the northern lights!
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Well Seymour, you are an odd fellow, but I must say... You steam a good ham.
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Chalmers walks away from the house.
HELP! HEEEELP!
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👍
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