TWC2: Beyond the Pages/2022/August

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Cut to Mike and Spike playing a game of eight-ball pool in the Baby Seal. Pibby watches as Spike pockets the 8-ball.
Spike
GG.
Pibby
Ohhh, so that's how pool works! Just... strike what you see and go from there.
Team Umizoomi peek out of one of the pockets.
Milli
Trust the pattern, Pibby. Solids, then stripes.
Pibby
Oh yeah, that too.
Milli
Although things would be much different if we had a snooker table instead of a pool table.
Pibby
Snooker...
Milli
I-it's a little more complex. You get the reds first, then you get the rest of the colours, in sequence within a frame. That frame is basically an individual game in a snooker match. That's... quite the pattern, hehe!
Pibby
Ohhhhh!
Michael Bloomberg
Yknow, Milli... I was once watching a world championship snooker match in Sheffield back in 1982. They've been holding it at the Crucible since 1977; it's a theatre.
Bot
Huh...! I guess the English really do love their sports.
Michael Bloomberg
The thing about snooker is it's seen as more prestigious in the UK, whereas pool is more laid back. But the crowd is also quite relaxed, in a way like golf.
Michael Bloomberg
Steve Davis was the heavily favoured defending world champion, but lemme just say... he crashed hard. Tony Knowles, that son of a gun, shut on him 10–1.
8-Ball
Sigh, one off from my favourite number...
Bot
What kind of mathemagician would say that?
Bot looks down from the table to find BFB contestant 8-Ball, who is clearly bigger and thus not on the table.
Bot
Oh dear...
Geo
It's just a sphere, Bot. I would know.
Michael Bloomberg
Soooo... how do you find the bar?
Bot
...Hehehehehhhhhhh-
Fivey
Ohhhh, look what we have here! Ol' Mike's got a new bar! This day's full of firsts, eh?
Michael Bloomberg
Oh yeah. New competition. Like a decathlon but bigger. I don't know much about it though. But I'm sure it went somewhere.
Seinfeld
Jerry
Hmmmm...
Cut back to the Baby Seal. Spike is reading a newspaper while Bloomberg is talking with Spike and Pibby as Team Umizoomi on the pool table.
Spike
HMM. YA LEARN SOMETHING NEW EVERYDAY, MAN.
Pibby
Oooh! What's in that newspaper?
Spike
LET'S SEE... A PICTISH SLAB IN A SCOTTISH MANSION... COACHING (AND WINNING) BACK-TO-BACK VANIER CUPS... 19th-CENTURY PERUVIAN LGBTQ+ HISTORY... 19th-CENTURY REMOTE WORKING...
Pibby
Remote working in the 19th century?
Spike
SHE WAS A TELEGRAPHIST. MAYBE SHE SENT OUT MORSE CODE MESSAGES IN HER OWN HOUSE?
Statler
What did she say out there?
Waldorf
Maybe something like, "SUX"?
Statler and Waldorf
Oh ho ho ho!
Geo
Oh, they really like it here. Hmph.
Pibby
I mean, sure, it's got all the chill vibes.
Geo
I was being sarcastic.

Cut to the quiet room.
Oh-! Why, hello there! I'm Candle.
Pibby
Hi! I'm Pibby.
Hm. The traveller, eh?
Pibby
I... guess?
Don't feel bad, Pibby. We're all unique in our own way. I travel as well sometimes, mostly on a journey towards inner peace.
Pibby
Huh...
It wasn't always quiet, though. I remember that troop of capuchin monkeys out in Costa Rica. Though they were quite hectic, I nevertheless learned to go with the flow and redirect my energy elsewhere.
Pibby
Oooh! Maybe you... thought as if it was goat yoga?
Perhaps.
Who's this?
Pibby
Oh, there's more of you...! Hi! uh- I'm P-
That's Pibby, a fellow traveller.
Well isn't that interesting? The name's Cabby, by the way. And this is Clover. Aren't you also the one who likes to learn?
Pibby
Absolutely!
Wonderful. A woman of culture.
...Oh oh oh! 2-Down is PETRI DISH!
Wrong definition.
Pibby
Ooh, a crossword? There's so many things I could learn from a crossword!
30 minutes later
If that is INNER, that must be MORIA... Done!
Pibby
Impressive stuff!
I know, right? It gets harder every day until Sunday. Then it resets on Monday.
Pibby
Hey... That puzzle looks familiar.
What, did you play it before?
Pibby
Nono, the housing.
Cut to three days ago in Wiki City.
Michael Bloomberg
It's super easy and a breeze to clean!
Pibby
I can see it. It's actually quite small.
Cut to an interior shot of a studio apartment.
Bot
Well, it's still too big for us!
Milli
Not when you can treat it like a giant trampoline park!
Geo
Or a skate park.
Pibby
They're a pretty obstreperous bunch...
Geo
Check this out. Slalom past the chairs' legs.
Cut to two days ago in a different borough.
Michael Bloomberg
With a bad boy like that, you can cancel that gym membership!
Pibby
But I don't-
Cut to an establishing shot of a five-floor walk up.
Pibby
That's a bit of a stretch.
Michael Bloomberg
Why not give it a try?
Pibby
Well, it's better than nothing.
Cut to the top.
Pibby
I'm exhausted.
Spike
IT WAS STILL WORTH IT, DUDE. YOU DID WELL.
Pibby
I guess you're right.
Bot
Need a lift down?
Cut to yesterday.
Michael Bloomberg
I must say, this space has endless possibilities!
Pibby
...What the heck is that?
Cut to an establishing shot of a major fixer upper.
Pibby
What am I supposed to do with this?
Michael Bloomberg
Fix 'er up. 'Er. Give it an extreme makeover.
Pibby
I think I've made my decision. I'll go for the studio apartment.
Milli
In theory, we could turn this house into another trampoline and skate park. But of course, we're small.
Pibby
You liked the studio apartment, though.
Milli
Oh yeah. At least for a short stay.

Pibby opens her Jeopardy! Page-A-Day Calendar into a $1000 clue in SAILING INTO HISTORY.
Pibby
Ooh ooh ooh! It's... Old Navy?
Molly
Keep trying! And don't forget to ask questions.
Pibby
Oh, so... where is it?
Molly
Nono, respond to the clue in the form of a question.
Pibby
OK. Where... is... Old... Ironsides?
Molly
Nice! That still counts.
Pibby
I've always wondered why the host says the answer and the contestants ask the questions.
Waldorf
And we've always wondered where all the risk is.
Statler
It would be more risky if we sued!
Statler and Waldorf
Oh ho ho ho!
Gil
Hecklers.
Deema
If I ran a show and they were there, I'd kick 'em out so fast you wouldn't see it. Yknow, Old Ironsides deflects the bullets, I deflect the hecklers. What goes up must come down.
Michael Bloomberg
The Baby Seal's got that personality.
Gil
I hate this already.
The credits roll.
Pibby
When's the show on TV?
Gil
I dunno.