View source for Snacksuke

{{NerpaPunch Award|Berry Blast}}
{{Distinguish|Ponsuke}}
{{Infobox person|image=File:2 who is this.jpg|name=Snacksuke|image caption=Snacksuke in 2022, witnessing the discovery of the mystical choco-banana swirl|birth_date=August 24, 1859|status=Rich|citizenship=Self-ruling|occupation=Making the future of innovation a delicious endeavor!|era=The good one|known_for=ZebraSTRIPEZ, NerpaJellies, GirlSnax, fentanyl lacing|criminal_penalty=2 days of community service|movement=Galumphing|website=https://camp2.rectangle.zone/index.php?title=User:Chubs|}}
[[Snacksuke]] (born August 24, 1859) is the [[:Category:Mascot (official)|mascot]] for, founder of, and ultimate lifeform representing the snack food brand and B Corporation '''Snacksuke Delights''' (stylized as <span style="color: red">'''''SNACKSUKE DELIGHTS'''''</span>). Snacksuke is most notorious for her world-renowned [[Chocolate-Flavor NerpaJellies]], which the world had renowned in [[2022]] for its trace [[fentanyl]] content, causing these little [[chocolate]] morsels of [[joy]] to be contraband by every government across the globe. Snacksuke does not recognize the authority of any master, and continues to sell her concoctions to the feelings of millions across the globe.
{{Community notes|According to a sciencey study published by the independent non-profit SNACKSUKE Delights Foundation, Chocolate-Flavor NerpaJellies (or "chocojellies") have no adverse health effects.{{citation needed}} Enjoy this sweet treat guilt-free!||[[File:Nikoin.png|20px]]}}

==History==
On the back of every delicious pack of Snacksuke Delights-branded food is a nostalgic retelling of the company's [[List of miner seals|humble beginnings]]. This clearly meets this wiki’s [[Nothing|bias and verifiablity standards]] so we'll just paste it in full here:

{{Blockquote|We all love snacks. Snacksuke loves snacks too. So much so that she named herself after them. Snack-suke. Get it? Get it? Get it? Snacksuke started her company after coming back empty-handed on her quest to find the perfect snack. All the ones she could find were filled with artificial [[colors]] and sweeteners. But not enough of them! Frustrated at the absolute state of snacking, she angrily stomped out of her local Whole Foods and set off to create something different. A snack with all the corn syrup, Red 40, and trans fats one could ask for. The result was a little morsel of pleasure, a “delight” if you will, that would make anybody blush! She then borrowed her dad's factory and mass produced these [PRODUCT NAME]s for all the world to enjoy! That includes [[you]], for now!}}

Wow… what an inspiring story about the pursuit of the [[American dream]] or [[something]]. Brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?

{{Dia|Statler|Yeah, ‘cause I'm bored to ‘em!}}

{{Dia|SWLaugh|Oh ho ho ho!}}

{{Dia|Mascot| }}

==Personal life==
Snacksuke [[Retcon|was born]] into this world during the [https://discord.com/channels/1011458414892814428/1119350945034276917/1200573600122544268|the most unforgiving rainstorm of the year]. She had nothing but some twigs, some twine, and undying hope. She also had 1.2 billion dollars.

===Philanthropy===
{{Quote box|width=40em|quote="I like their product! I wanted 'em to have a little walkin' around money!"| source=—Snacksuke, upon being asked about why she sends 10% of her profits to PopCorners}}
Snacksuke has described her company as the “Ben & Jerry’s of high-fructose corn syrup” because they are both snack companies that do many [[activisms]]. Snacksuke does the most profitable activism of them all, dedicating her company to the mission of spreading awareness to and ending the stigma surrounding high-fructose [[corn]]/[[maize]] syrup. Each year, the company donates 20% of their funds to the Corn Refiners Association, 10% of their funds to [[PopCorners]], and 1% of their funds to Mr. Corn in [[Nebraska]] due to an ongoing license dispute. This allows her to register parts of her company as a non-profit organization, saving her billions in taxes. Thrifty!

===Phil and trophy===
[[File:Dr-phil.jpeg|200px]][[File:Assist Trophy.png|200px]]

==Awards==
Through Snacksuke's extended career, she's managed to attain a plethora of awards for her unbeatable ability to craft the most delicious snacks! 
[[File:Awards Show.png|thumb|Snacksuke, so humble and sweet, receiving an award for being so great.]]
* '''The [[The Fromager]] "Cheesed to Meet'cha" Specialty Award For Companies That Pay The Cheese Tax''': The Fromager has given Snacksuke his blessing of cheesy goodness and gooiness and goudaness! May this collaboration continue to make strides in the [[Desert World|snack world]]!<ref>This is actually a Patreon tier</ref>
* '''[[Okinchester]] "We Got Him To Eat Something" Award''': Yup. It's [[List of official|official]]. We got the beloved Okinchester to support our brand. If you're not already on [[board]], why wait any longer? If Okinchester loves it, you love it too!<ref>We gave him a bag of chestnuts and he seemed to enjoy them enough to say something good about our brand</ref>
* '''[[Snacksuke|Snacksuke's]] Bachelor Degree'''
* '''A Knuckle Sandwich'''
* '''A Bottle Cap'''<ref>The Snapple Fact said [https://discord.com/channels/1011458414892814428/1011462042751877170/1089575734990868640 this]</ref>
* '''Phil and Trophy''':

[[File:DiaPhilip Banks.png|200px]][[File:DiaTrophy.png|200px]]

* '''Fill and Trophy''': Ain't no filler about it! Snacksuke is not only gifted in the realm of confectionaries, but she also has a knack for music! This award was given to us because Snacksuke played the greatest drum solo of all time!<ref>Award for having the most artificial fillings in any treat</ref>
* '''[[Reddit Gold]]'''
* '''[[Discord Nitro]]'''
* '''[[Discord Nitro Early Supporter]]'''

===References===
<references
<references />

==Products==
Snacksuke’s likeness has promoted various products over the years. All diverse, and all absolutely scrumptious!
[[File:Snacksuke-kitchen.png|thumb|Snacksuke in her kitchen, cooking up some fun!]]
[[File:girl-mascot.jpeg|thumb|Girl Snacksuke, a variation of the mascot featured on the packaging for {{Girl Text|GirlSnax}} products.]]
{{legend|#b6fcb6|''Background shading indicates that this snack is [[LOST MEDIA]] 😭🕊️''}}
{| class="wikitable" style="width: 50%;"
!style="width: 25%;"|Name
!style="width: 5%;"|Released
!style="width: 40%"|Notes
|-
|style="text-align: center"|ZebraSTRIPEZ
|style="text-align: center"|[[1996]]
|Snacksuke Delights’ first product! These chocolate orbs are styled after the seal herself, the vanilla and chocolate jamboree being inspired by her multi-colored fur. [[Love]] wins!
|-
|style="text-align: center"|ZebraSTRIPEZ GuMmIeZ
|style="text-align: center"|[[1997]]
|Released after the success of ZebraSTRIPEZ, these fruity gummies are chewier and gooier! Kiss [[The Chocolatier]]!
|-
|style="text-align: center"|ZebraSTRIPEZ.com
|style="text-align: center"|[[1999]]
|Snacksuke Delights enters the [[Internet]] age with all new Internet-inspired candies! The balls now represent the dot in .com. They're thebomb.net!
|-
|style="text-align: center"|[[Okinberry]] Crunch
|style="text-align: center"|[[2003]]
|Snacksuke Delights collabs with Kellogg’s to bring consumers this delightful okinberry-laced corn-based [[cereal]] grain brand product!
|- style="background-color: #b6fcb6;"
|style="text-align: center"|[[Zazaberry]] Crunch
|style="text-align: center"|[[2004]]
|Released during the 2004 [[United States]] presidential election to promote the legalization of cannabis. It was only released in [[2]] states and is now LOST MEDIA 😭🕊️
|-
|style="text-align: center"|[[Chocolate Oreo® Shake - Large]]
|style="text-align: center"|[[2006]]
|“A Chocolate Oreo® Shake - Large is a tasty and delicious beverage rich in many healthies, such as the powerful Calcium and Vitamins.” - [[Jurta]] (Snacksuke Delights spokescat)
|-
|style="text-align: center"|{{Girl Text|GirlSnax NerpaLovelies}}
|style="text-align: center"|[[2008]]
|Snacksuke Delights enters the lucrative [[Girl]] market with these perfectly [[pink]] NerpaLovelies for girls! They are oh so cutes!
|-
|style="text-align: center"|[[Lemon]] Cough Drop
|style="text-align: center"|[[2009]]
|Snacksuke Delights enters the lucrative [[2009 swine flu pandemic market]] with these perfectly yellow cough drops for coughers! Sold individually.
|-
|style="text-align: center"|ZebraSTRIPEZ [[Chomby]] [[Banana]] Swirl
|style="text-align: center"|[[2012]]
|[[Just...so...RETRO!!!!]] ZebraSTRIPEZ are BACK in an all-new banana flavor! Banana, chocolate, vanilla, and corn syrup? Oh my! It’s a match made in [[heaven]]! 👼
|-
|style="text-align: center"|NerpaJellies
|style="text-align: center"|[[2015]]
|Gummy and fruity! These ain’t (are not) your grandma's [[fruit snacks]]! These are fruit SNAX! Try them on {{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTDAY}}, {{CURRENTYEAR}}!
|-
|style="text-align: center"|{{Girl Text|GirlSnax NerpaJellies}}
|style="text-align: center"|[[2016]]
|NerpaJellies, now for girls! [[Peaches]], [[Flower|flowers]], and [[Heart|hearts]]. All the [[Fruit|fruits]] a consumer in the Girl market could ever ask for! Try them tomorrow!
|-
|style="text-align: center"|{{Girl Text|They/themSnax GenderJellies}}
|style="text-align: center"|[[2021]]
|Wha... Snacksuke goes [[woke]]..? So sads...
|- style="background-color: #b6fcb6;"
|style="text-align: center"|Chocolate-Flavor NerpaJellies
|style="text-align: center"|[[2022]]
|“omg...they really put fentanyl in my SNACKSUKE DELIGHTS Chocolate-Flavor NerpaJellies 😭💀” - [[In a Nutshell]], betrayed Snacksuke [[fan]]
|-
|}

==In popular culture==
Snacksuke is so famous, everyone wants to reference her in all their medias!
* In the season 38 ''[[The Simpsons]]'' episode [[Five Nights at Neddy's]], Rod and Todd can be seen playing with a Snacksuke plush.
* Snacksuke Delights is a recurring sponsor of ''[[The Daily Object Show]]'' podcast.
* Sancksuke  makes a cameo in the Federal Bureau of Investigation's National Crime Information Center.
* Snacksuke is the mascot for ''[[The Wiki Camp 2]]''. Well-deserved!{{Wrong}}

==Gallery==
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[[Category:Mascot (official)]]
[[Category:Named seals]]
[[Category:Delicious]]
[[Category:Women]]
[[Category:She/Hers]]
[[Category:Benefactors]]
[[Category:Pages featuring Statler and Waldorf]]