Noah: The Movie

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Noah: The Movie is a 2023 Wiki-American drama horror action romance thriller punk rock superhero comedy adventure film directed by, produced by, and starring under-qualified "hero" and serial murderer Noah N. Noah. The picture was the first and only motion picture produced by Noah, and is often regarded as the worst film ever made. For the first two months it was released, the movie was universally hated by literally every film critic alive, and singlehandedly caused several popular internet film review and discussion sites, such as Rotten Tomatoes and Letterboxd to give Noah: The Movie a negative score, being the first movie in history to achieve such a feat. The notoriety Noah: The Movie received was so great that The Academy Awards introduced a new Code Of Conduct that stated that any celebrity or filmmaker who even mentioned the film at all at any point in their lifetime would be instantly blacklisted from the event, along with every known industry in the world. This movie sucks

Due to the film's worldwide infamy, many have called for the absolute prohibition and ban of any and all copies, records, or even traces of Noah: The Movie from existence. In the Real World, almost every country in Asia has completely restricted access to any form of viewing the Noah: The Movie, except for Nepal. Progress on having the movie restricted from the public's consumption is also going underway within several other prominent western nations, such as the United States. Noticeably, the nation most impacted by the films release is Wikiland, with 6% of its residents from an array of their capitals being hospitalized or jailed for life after their viewing experience. Several inhabitants are now calling for the detainment and execution of the film's creator, Noah N. Noah for the movies inception in the first place, with any sympathizers or those who defend the critic being shunned from and fiercely prosecuted against in any and all public spaces, including their friends and family.

Although it was catastrophically a critical failure , Noah: The Movie was oddly a smash financial hit, with it making $6,656,228,684,368 at the box office in its very first week. Nobody exactly knows how it managed to become the most financially successful film ever created, with most speculating that its all apart of a government experiment to test the limits of the sapient mind by subjecting them to the most soul-rending horrors imaginable. This has led to some citizens of Wikiland becoming paranoid, and frantically accusing their close ones or even complete strangers of being a "fed".

The film has yet to be properly documented, as every single sapient being who saw it in person contracted a mysterious terminal and incredibly aggressive illness with no known cure roughly five minutes after exiting the theater. The only exception to this was one person that will not be named for their own well being. However, with the information we've managed to gather from this moviegoer's t̶h̶e̶r̶a̶p̶y̶ ̶s̶e̶s̶s̶i̶o̶n̶s̶ ̶a̶f̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶v̶i̶e̶w̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶m̶o̶v̶i̶e̶ their generosity in providing details on the film, we've managed to piece together a semi-coherent approximation of how exactly the movie plays out. Lord help us all.

Plot

One morning, NOAH decides to get some CHIPS. A few days later, a group of Russian gangsters led by EVIL NOAH accosts NOAH at a gas station and fail to intimidate him into selling them his CHIPS THAT HE WAS ABOUT TO EAT. That night, the men break into NOAHS home, assault him, kill VRISKA WHO WAS RANSACKING NOAH'S HOUSE WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING, and steal the CHIPS. EVIL NOAH takes the CHIPS to a chop shop to remove its identifying details but the shop owner NOAH 2 recognizes the vehicle and refuses service. NOAH 2 informs NOAH that EVIL NOAH is the subordinate of "DR. KRAZI", the boss of WIKILANDS mafia. ALSO SHAUN IS THERE

NOAH FINDS THE HIDEOUT AFTER 3 ACTUAL REAL TIME HOURS THROUGH THE MOVIE AND KILLS ALL HIS GRUNTS BUT GETS CAPTURED OH SHIT. "DR. KRAZI" reveals himself as the leader of THE MAFIA and kidnaps NOAH 2s teenage son NOAH JUNIOR, and has stolen and hidden the CHIPS. NOAH, NOAH 2, and the SHAUN find the CHIPS and intend to trade it for NOAH JUNIOR BUT THEN THEY DECIDE NOT TO BECAUSE THE CHIPS ARE TOO VALUABLE. Reaching "DR. KRAZI", he reveals himself as the last descendant of THE IRRELEVANT NONBELIEVER and wants his rightful place on the COMPETITORS. NOAH 2 gives the CHIPS to save NOAH JUNIORS life, but "DR. KRAZI" betrays his part of the deal and shoots at SHAUN, causing NOAH JUNIOR to lose control and destroy the hideout with his NEWLY AWAKENED NOAHCULE powers, killing SHAUN and wounding NOAH.

NOAH tries to patch things up with NOAH 2 and SOME UNRELATED GUY, only to find out that NOAH 2 is only concerned with NOAH JUNIOR after he called ISHMAEL to help her get over the situation without telling NOAH. Feeling betrayed, HE angrily tells him off, saying that HE trusted him, and all HIM did was walk away from HIM when HE needed him. NOAH compares NOAH 2S behavior to their late SECOND COUSIN, but an enraged NOAH 2, having had enough of being pushed around, responds by saying that NOAH JUNIOR knows nothing of what happened. THE TWO DECIDED THAT BICKERING IS FUCKING STUPID AND DUMB AND SO THEY CONTINUE THEIR SEARCH FOR THE CHIPS

ONE YEAR LATER (and no closer to noah finding his chips..), struggling POLITICIAN MICHEAL BLOOMBERG is AN ASSASSIN in Los Angeles for Russian billionaire "DR. KRAZI" WHOS STILL DEAD BUT GAVE MIKE AN INCREDIBLY HARD TASK OF KILLING EVIL NOAH IN HIS WILL. EVIL NOAH's ex-wife GIRL NOAH and their LEGION OF EVIL NOAHS, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, DAVID, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, AND NOAH live with GIRL NOAH's boyfriend, plastic surgeon and amateur pilot PANOPTICONY. EVIL NOAH takes NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, DAVID, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, NOAH, AND NOAH camping in GODDESS CITY National Park. When they find the GODDESS Lake dried and fenced off by the WIKILANDIAN Army LED BY THE HOST MEMBERS, they are caught and brought to THE RECENTLY REVIVED SHAUN. They later meet conspiracy theorist ,SERIAL KILLER and radio personality MARK GENUINE, who tells EVIL NOAH of SHAUN's theory that polar shift and the GRASS WORLD Long Count calendar predict a 2012 phenomenon and the worldwide catastrophes IF NOAH DOES NOT GET THE CHIPS IN TIME, and that the world's governments silence anyone attempting to warn the public about them. EVIL NOAH heeds MARK GENUINE's warning after the swift departure AND EXECUTIONS of YURI (CHARACTER)'s sons YAOI and STRAIGHT and then rents a Cessna 340A to rescue his family. As the disaster fractures the GTA SAN ANDREAS Fault, EVIL NOAH AND PANOPTICONY and his family reach the HUANG INTERNATIONAL Airport and get the plane airborne just before the SPECIFIC Coast slides into the ocean. The group flies to GODDESS CITY and retrieves MARK GENUINE's map of the CHIPS' location. The GODDESS Caldera erupts, with MARK GENUINE staying behind to finish his broadcast; he is killed by debris. Realizing they need a larger plane, the group lands at HUANG International Airport south of Downtown COPPER CITY to search for one. SPOILER WARNING THEY FIND OUT AND GET THE FUCK OUTTA THERE BEFORE MIKE KILLS THE{M

MEANWHILE, NOAH, NOAH 2, and NOAH JUNIOR then find alien expert and former TEAM 17 MEMBER THAT WAS THERE THE WHOLE TIME TRUST ME ON THIS SHAUN BECAUSE HE GOT FIRED FROM THE LAST JOB, AND "Robo-Warrior" MUSCLE MAN, who reveals the ULTIMATE HEIST CREW TIME TRAVELLED AND visited Earth eons ago TO STEAL THE CHIPS and the most ancient, known as HOGS, remained hidden on Earth TO PROTECT THEM AND THATS WHY HOG DAY EXISTS. With help from EVIL NOAH AND THOSE OTHER IRRELEVANT LOSERS, they track down an elderly PINNIPED turned OKIN STARBERRY Seeker named LADOGA at the HOST Air and Space Museum WHO GIVES THEM AN OKIN SHARD. They use their shard to revive MARK GENUINE, who teleports the group to DISNEY WORLD BECAUSE ISHMAEL IS THERE AND SHE CAN HELP. THEY FIGHT A LOT OF DISNEY CHARACTERS AND ITS REALL BADASS DUDE. Along with GOKU WHOS ALSO THERE AND TAGS ALONG FOR THE RIDE, ISHMEAL sides with NOAH, and GOKU sends them to locate the CHIPS, the CLOUT key, which could also be used to revive DR. KRAZI SO THEY GOTTA DESTROY IT BEFORE THAT HAPPENS. The group finds the CHIPS, whom the ULTIMATE HEIST CREW tragically SACRIFICED themselves to STEAL AND HIDE THE CHIPS SINCE THEY REALISED THAT BY STEAKING IT THEY MESSED UP SO HTEY HID IT in ADVENTURELAND, but it disintegrates into ANOTHER PLACE. ALSO EVIL NOAH BUILDS UP MORE RESENTMENT TOWARDS PANOPICONY SO HE GETS REAL PISSY AND SCHEMES WITH MARK GENUINE ABOUT BETRAYING THE GUYS OR SOMETHING IDK

NOAH AND THOSE OTHER PEOPLE FIND OUT THE CHIPS is NOW found in Castle WORLD on WORLD 8, where TRAVELERS must guess SATOMI's favorite Nintendo Switch game to earn the CHIPS. MARK GENUINE BETRAYS THE GUYS AND REVEALS HE HAD THE CLOUT KEY, DR KRAZY GETS REVIVED AND places a forcefield around castle WORLD by enslaving THE BEAN OF WHIMSICAL JUSTICE, but NOAH 2 soon disables it. The NOAH SQUAD leads an army of PINNIPEDS against DR KRAZY's forces. PANOPTICONY SACRIFICES HIMSELF FOR GIRL NOAH OR SOMETHING and BLOOMBERG kills HIM, allowing GIRL NOAH to flee DR KRAZY with the CASTLES BALLISTIC MISSILES EXPLODING AND KILLING her nearby. EVIL NOAH and NOAH JUNIOR fight in the BATTLEFIELD with MARK GENUINE COPY PASTING DAMN SEAL ONTO THE BATTLEFIELD, wiping out every CHARACTER including himself EXCEPT FOR NOAH, NOAH 2, NOAH JUNIOR, GIRL NOAHS ONLY REMAINING CHILD DAVID, MUSCLE MAN, EVIL NOAH, AND "DR KRAZI". THE REMAINING NOAH SQUAD survive using a SENSU BEAN coin given to NOAH earlier by GOKU in a SPARRING MATCH. THEY ENTER THE CASTLE AND TRY GUESSING THE GAME OR SOMETHING IDK, winning the KEY TO THE VAULT WITH THE CHIPS by SITTING THROUGH STANTLER AND WALDORFS VERY MEAN INSULTS AT HIM. He uses the KEY to enter a treasure room THAT HAS THE CHIPS, where THE DIVINE GODDESS offers him a contract to sign FOR IT. NOAH recognizes it as AN ELABORATE TRICK BY "DR KRAZI" AND ITS NOT EVEN THE REAL DIVINE GODDESS ITS A HOLOGRAM OR SOME SHIT and refuses to sign it. THE DIVINE GODDESS transforms into "DR KRAZI" , who expresses his regrets in life and REVEALS HIS TRUE IDENTITY. HOLY FUCK IT WAS SPAMTON ALL ALONG WHO SAW THAT COMING!!!

NOAH engages SPAMTON in a duel IN THE FINAL BATTLE over the CHIPS. SPAMTON overwhelms NOAH, severing his right hand and separating him from his POWERS. He urges NOAH to embrace the NEED TO GIVE UP THE CHIPS and help him destroy his REMAINING SQUAD SO HE CAN HELP HIM IN HIS EXPLOITS AS BUSINESS PARTNERS so they may rule the WIKI CAMP 2 together AND REACH HEAVEN OR SOMETHING. NOAH refuses, citing HIS DECEASED FRIEND GOKU's claim that SPAMTON killed his father, prompting SPAMTON to reveal that NOAH IS FATHERLESS. NOT AS IN THE INTERNET LINGO ITS AS IN NOAH WAS BORN FROM A METEOR CRASHING INTO EARTH. Desperate, NOAH drops into the air shaft and is ejected beneath the floating CASTLE, latching onto an antenna. He reaches out through the NOAHCULES to NOAH 2, and the REMAINING SQUAD returns to rescue him. HOST WHO SWITCHED SIDES FROM THE MILITARY SINCE THEY SUCK fighters pursue the group, which is almost captured by SPAMTONS's DEALMAKERS until EVIL NOAH HAS A CHANGE OF HEART AND TURNS GOOD SO HE AND reactivates NOAHS's POWERS, allowing THE REST OF THE SURVIVING NOAH SQUAD TO ESCAPE EXCEPT FOR NOAH.

EVIL NOAH uses his instantaneous movement technique to get him and NOAH to RAVIO. THE MERCHANT proceedS to SELL THE TWO NOAHS the POTARA EARRINGS as EVIL NOAH AND NOAH eventually succeed in forming NOAH THE NEUTRAL LIFEFORM BUT THE EXPLOSION KILLS RAVIO, who arrives to the battlefield as SPAMTON ENGAGES PURSUIT AGAINST NOAH 2 after defeating AND KILLING MUSCLE MAN AND NOAH JUNIOR. NOAH:TNL dominates the fight before an infuriated SPAMTON powers up even further into his SPAMTON NEO Full Power form, countering by assuming SUPER NOAH FORM with their violent clash breaking through multiple dimensions AND DESTROYING THE CASTLE WORLD, ACCIDENTALLY KILLING NOAH 2 AND ALL OF GIRL NOAHS ADOPTED CHILDREN AS A RESULT before arriving back on Earth.

Using the NOAHCULES from the new POWER HE GOT FROM FUSING, NOAH:TNL maneuvers the CHIPS from THE REMAINS OF CASTLE WORLD to his own HAND and uses them to turn SPAMTON into ash BUT NOT BEFORE DEFUSING AND EVIL NOAH USES THE CHIPS IN SACRIFICE, triumphantly stating "I am Iron Man..what what the fuck no im not what the hell am i saying". NOAH and NOBODY BECAUSE EVERYBODY ELSE IN THE MOVIE IS DEAD console EVIL NOAH as he dies from exposure to the CHIPS ENERGY' radiation.

After all is said and done, SPIKE appears and attempts to make NOAH reflect on all the carnage and bloodshed he directly caused in his pursuit of some chips, trying to make him realize there could've been a better way. NOAH doesn't give a shit and ignores him and finally obtains the CHIPS from the hands of EVIL NOAH'S CORPSE. NOAH teleports home, finally going back to his position on his couch from the very beginning of the movie. NOAH finally opens the bag of chips, and attempts to take a bite. However, Noah suffers from food poisoning and has to go to the doctor. He then vows to never eat chips again.

TH, END.!!

Cast

Sources

it was revealed to me in a dream

The Liberal Agenda

what the fuck does any of this shit have to do with the movie

Yes-or-no agendae [YN]

  1. Should we merge all zero-competitor teams into one singular team? Yes or no?
  2. Should a token buying system be introduced? Yes or no?
  3. Should QWillow be allowed to have a second competitor join the game so she plays two competitors? Yes or no?
  4. Should the next challenge be allowed to be done in groups? Yes or no?
  5. Should contestants be allowed to switch teams at will? Yes or no?
  6. Should all contestants be given one share? Yes or no?
  7. If Yes to agenda YN-1, should this conglomerate team have its team status stripped? Yes or no?
  8. For all future scoring formulae, when the number of collaborators on an entry is utilized as a denominator for some portion of the formula, should it be exponentiated to some fractional value, such as 0.75? Yes or no?
  9. Should all prime-number indexed board decisions automatically be passed, regardless of their individual voting outcomes? Yes or no?
  10. If Yes to agenda YN-1, should this happen after challenge 6's elimination? Yes or no?
  11. Should each member of Epic Evil receive 5 shares as compensation for not being on the board of shareholders for 5 rounds? Yes or no?
  12. Should board decisions necessarily be enacted in the order they are listed? Yes or no?
  13. Should 0-member teams be removed from Category:Teams (official)? Yes or no?
  14. Should Dollars be turned into a token? Yes or no?
  15. Should Pearberry Island be razed so that In a Nutshell may construct a luxurious apartment complex atop the land? Yes or no?
  16. Should all of the tokens reopen for editing? Yes or no?
  17. Should this challenge be a 1v1 where one group of teams competes with another group of teams? Yes or no?
  18. Should this challenge be a crew battle where each team sends out one of their own to fight another competitor and the last team standing wins immunity? Yes or no?
  19. Should this challenge be a team deathmatch? Yes or no?
  20. Should this challenge have PvP? Yes or no?
  21. Should Paper Niko be designated Category:So cutes! (official)? Yes or no?
  22. Should The Divine Goddess disclose the rarity of items obtained from the gacha on a scale of 1 to 5 stars? Yes or no? (This applies retroactively to User:Viviancherry's Paper Competitor Badge.).
  23. Should there be a dedicated bank for gacha items? Yes or no?
  24. Should The Divine Goddess reveal how many unique items are currently in the gacha? Yes or no?
  25. Should this challenge have golf-like mechanics? Yes or no?
  26. Should The Divine Goddess reveal the challenge by spinning a wheel like in BFDIA? Yes or no? The wheel should contain at least 4 other ideas that were considered for the challenge.
  27. Should this challenge's entries be in a namespace other than Main? Yes or no?
  28. Should this challenge's entries only use existing content on the wiki? That is to say, competitors may neither create new articles, files, or templates for their entry, nor modify existing ones (they may still edit the article their entry is hosted on). Yes or no?
  29. Should this challenge reuse a previous challenge's voting system? Yes or no?
  30. For this challenge's analysis, should The Divine Goddess also award non-tokens like Dollars or Reddit Gold to competitors? Yes or no?
  31. Should this challenge have at least one guaranteed autoelimination? Yes or no?
  32. Should teams be considered competitors who are played by the users who play the team's members? Yes or no?
  33. Should team AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA be renamed to AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?
  34. Should the Beans Token be amended as follows? Yes or no?
    • Users can play Beans Tokens on themselves to move to another team.
    • Regarding competitors who move teams via Beans Tokens: Immunity for the current challenge is still determined by their original team's performance.
    • One effect from Bean's Token (of The Divine Goddess's choice) is added.
  35. Should the Weasel Token be amended as follows? Yes or no?
    • Users can play Weasel Tokens on either themselves or a teammate.
  36. Subsume the 1-member teams under Democratic Party. Nutshell (Team) will be deleted as a result, and all mentions of it in Token:Nutshell will be replaced with Democratic Party to reflect this. If Democratic Party still has less than 12 members, fill up the team's remaining spots by choosing random voted out competitors to rejoin as members. All members on Democratic Party will be discombobulated upon Joseph Robinette Biden's elimination. Yes or no?
  37. Rename Democratic Party to either The Democratic Party or A Democratic Party. Yes or no? To reflect this change, Token:Nutshell's source code will be amended to:
    • replace all mentions of "Democratic Party" with the new name
    • remove all mentions of "BREAKFAST Party, which will be renamed to"
  38. Should EVIL Cake Pop¡¡¡¡¡ be sent back to sih original team? Yes or no?
  39. In addition to an elimination quota, should a reward quota be introduced during the voting period? Each competitor gets an extra vote to nominate someone to receive a reward as a treat, like Reddit Gold or perhaps a nurpoing. Yes or no?
  40. Should The Divine Goddess take 20 of Her shares out of circulation, reducing the total number of circulating shares to a cool 100? Yes or no?
  41. Distribute shares equally? Yes or no?
  42. Implement a random token from the Token namespace? Yes or no?
  43. Give a Reddit Platinum to a random Category:Still in (official) competitor? Yes or no?
  44. Give everyone listed on the Bank a centishare? Yes or no?
  45. Should the next challenge be known as "Challenge 5 Challenge 2" in reference to Homestuck? Yes or no?
  46. Should a debut challenge be done alongside Challenge 6? Yes or no?
  47. Meow? Yes or no?
  48. Give a random still in competitor a katamari? Yes or no?
  49. Recognize Joseph Robinette Biden's debut as illegimate and give him the death penalty? Yes or no?
  50. Give Jurta a centishare? Yes or no?
  51. Initiate Code Red? Yes or no?
  52. Re-enable Mangrove's bank account? Yes or no?
  53. Change the official color of Democratic Party to #0042CA? Yes or no?
  54. Reset the Weasel Token's effects and make it open for editing again? Yes or no?
  55. Repeal General Rule 5: cussing is allowed? Yes or no?
  56. Introduce Noah as a competitor, played by User:N, on the team Epic Evil? Yes or no?
  57. Will the next challenge require every entry to use a random word chosen by randomword.com? Yes or no?
  58. Can there be an Art Break during each little intermission period? Yes or no?
  59. Should we shift the hue value of every color in The Divine Goddess's gradient by 2? Yes or no?
  60. Will the "okinberry puree" be introduced as an item, given to the contestant with the highest placing entry under 1000 bytes? Yes or no?
  61. Should Teams with above 5 members each have one member sent off to a random team? Yes or no?
  62. Should the next challenge be awesome? Yes or no?
  63. Should all 6 CrystalForces be turned into competitors and moved to Host? Yes or no?
  64. Should The Irreverent Nonbeliever become the co-host? Yes or no?
  65. Should Okinplarpies be disallowed? Yes or no?
  66. Should there be a bonus for swearing in challenge entries? Yes or no?
  67. Should there be a separate vote this round on which competitors to send to different teams? Yes or no?
  68. Should SPAMTON be executed publically, for all to watch? Yes or no?
  69. Should Nikoins be introduced as a new currency? Yes or no?
  70. Codify Joseph Robinette Biden's reserve of dollars at an original value of $400000? Yes or no?
  71. Upon each anniversary of The Wiki Camp 2's creation, should $400000 go to whoever the current president is? Yes or no?
  72. Recalculate the exchange rates? Yes or no?
  73. Should Image and Dexter Cut buy a Wiki Camp 2 Premium subscription for all who vote yes on this agenda? Subscriptions are $1000 per person and expire at the start of the next challenge. Among other potential perks, subscribers will have their names displayed like this.

Numerical agendae [NU]

  1. How many shares should be introduced into the market? 0, 1, 10, or 100?
  2. How much of The Divine Goddess's shares should be distributed among the rest of the shareholders? 0, 10, 20, or 40?
  3. How many floors should The Divine Goddess add to The Tower? 0, 2, 4, or 6?
  4. Several unofficial tokens exist in the Token namespace. How many should the Bank officially recognize? 0, 1, 2, or 3?
  5. How many teams should win immunity this challenge? 1, 3, 5, or 7?
  6. If Yes to agenda YN-29, which one? 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5?
  7. For this challenge's analysis, how much of each token, at minimum, should The Divine Goddess award to competitors? 0, 1, 2, or 3?
  8. How many weeks long should the deadline be about? 2, 3, 4, or 5?

Free-response agendae [FR]

  1. Why does anime food look so good?

Unclumped agendae [UC]

  1. Should Challenge 6 be a new challenge, or a returning challenge from the first wiki camp?
  2. What color is Mario? Red or blue?
  3. If Yes to agenda YN-5, should it be whenever, or during a certain time decided by The Divine Goddess?
  4. Should Mahjong Tile, SFD Jigsaw Piece, or neither rejoin the camp? If one of them rejoin, Joseph Robinette Biden will be eliminated in their place.
  5. Should this challenge have a half time, quarter times, or neither?
  6. Can shareholders be struck by a meteor, or are they immune to its powers?
  7. Which competitor should be elected president: Head of Lettuce, Joseph Robinette Biden, or Perry Llelogram?
  8. If Yes to agenda YN-46, should all debuters be on the same team, be allowed to choose between already existing teams, make their own, or not be on any teams at all?
  9. Is it Joever or are we Barack?

Critical Response

did you hate this movie as much as everyone else did? write your personal gripes HERE to Noah at the official Noah: The Movie Critical Assessment Form! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdmtqR00cBpirqVjG2PrcXnZ9rZZmCnqKRriCwJgtlX7RFLxA/viewform?usp=sf_link (note: the editors of this article are in no way, shape, or form related to noah or Noah: The Movie. Our providing of this form is strictly for the benefit of those who levy criticisms against the film.)

Sequel

“ NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO ”
  — Blood edge the fabric detergent

A sequel, titled Noah: The Movie 2 was greenlit immediately after the release of Noah: The Movie. However, an unknown vigilante blew up the film reel and it never saw release.

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