Frontier Psychiatrist

Frontier Psychiatrist is a song by The Avalanches, a band known for their simple and shallow yet vapidly enjoyable music. Frontier Psychiatrist is famous for being their easiest song to perform in terms of person requirements.

Performance

A live performance of Frontier Psychiatrist requires the following assets and performers.

• 1 boy named Dexter (boy must be in need of psychiatric evaluation)
• 1 school principal and 1 mother (mother must be related to Dexter)
• 2 drum sets (2nd drum set must be played by a monkey)
• 2 cowboys (1 cowboy must be equipped with a hand gun)
• 1 Horse
• 1 horn section (3 horn players)
• 1 choir section (8 ghosts)
• 2 vocal performers
• 1 frontier psychiatrist
• 1 turtle man
• 1 coconut
• 1 kazoo
• 1 pair of talking false teeth
• 1 sentient skeleton with a golden eyeball
• 1 record player
• 1 snake charmer and 1 snake
• 1 female storyteller
• 1 Indigenous American
• 1 man with 1 wig (man must have traveled to another world at some point)
• 1 sailor (sailor must have encountered 20,000 girls)
• 1 baby
• 1 woman (3 rectangles)
• 2 female wellness experts
• 1 man (with 1 typewriter)
• 3 string performers (1 violin, 1 viola 1 cello)
• 1 [BLACKLISTED]
• 1 cuckoo clock (containing 1 cat [previously 1 bird])
• 1 exotic dancer
• 1 schoolteacher (schoolteacher must have at least 1 female pupil)
• 1 parrot (human sized)
• 1 turntable scratcher
• 1 giant record
• 1 mariachi band (1 guitarrón, 2 guitars, 1 vihuela, 2 congas, 1 pair of claves, 1 pair of maracas, 1 bombo)

If you are thinking of having a live performance but do not know what song to perform, and you just so happen to have 38 specific willing participants (as well as a horse, 8 ghosts, a turtle, a sentient skeleton, a snake, a monkey, a cat, and a human-sized parrot) it is highly recommended to perform this song, as the logistics will be fairly simple.