Musical instruments are a class of weapons used for serenading enemies since antiquity. Musical instruments can fall into four major orders:
- Brass instruments are the instruments of winter. They are the shiny metal ones, with the exception of the saxophones. They include trumpets, trombones, and tubas.
- Woodwind instruments are the instruments of spring. Many are made of wood, but some have evolved metal hides. They include flutes, clarinets, harmonicas, accordions, and bagpipes.
- String instruments are the instruments of summer. They are a vital organ system for both the orchestra and rock band. They include guitars, pianos, and violins.
- Percussion instruments are the instruments of fall. Most things on Earth are percussive. Just play a rhythm and you're good. They include drums, xylophones, shakers, and bells.
- Mayonnaise and horseradish are the instruments of the solar eclipse. As such, they are the ultimate instruments.