User:Jurta/sandbox/subdivision

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DiaGod.png
God Verified organization tick.png Twitter
@RealGod

Replying to @RealGod

Um... I've got no money left in my bank account... Can someone send money to my Ko-fi? Please..?

April 21, 2023 

DiaGod.png
God Verified organization tick.png Twitter
@RealGod

Replying to @RealGod

Sigh... I think this is it... I'm going to have to file for bankruptcy... Goodbye guys... Twm 1f62d.png

April 23, 2023 

Retconning

Perhaps it could be possible to retcon a god out of existence? For example, introducing new information that contradicts their existence by saying that they don't, and then proceeding to eradicate any evidence of them ever being there. This includes relationships and props. The god will no longer be acknowledged, and will fade into obscurity, and then out of reality. Win!

Trap them

Lead their unsuspecting cursor over an ordinary but trite blue link... watch them get damned for all eternity, stuck in a paradox of death. May cause mild server problems.*
* VERY MUCH server problems. Don't even try this, especially at home..!

You could also use a Captchalogue card and captchalogue them for life. They'd be stuck forever, not being able to get out... Try not to let the card fall into the wrong hands... Someone could punch it and then make clones of the god! Eeeyikes!

Unsolvable sudoku

Give them a sudoku to solve! But put in a catch... where the puzzle is rigged to be UNSOLVABLE. They'll spend countless hours trying to figure out the solution... when there isn't one! Oh ho ho ho!

They'll then cluelessly spend days, weeks, pathetic months on this one puzzle, so long that time becomes meaningless... The little baby angels will become oh so upset and start a rebellion out of impatience! Yeowch!

Capables

freddy: killing god or godly killing?

These are people that can perform deicide at their own will. I'm calling them "capables".

The god themselves

They can stop existing on their own. I think? Yeah.

Higher powers

People say that nobody can be more powerful than a god, but is that really oh so true? Maybe, somewhere out there... there IS a more powerful being? IDK.

Wiki editors

Anyone with the knowledge of editing a wiki can follow the instructions of trapping them! It's as easy as cake.

God tier players

Any god tier player could probably very much certainly use their powers to defeat a god. After all, their stories are typically longer than The Bible itself!

Doctor Robotnik

Doctor Robotnik probably has some super powerful weapon that could kill any form of god. After all, he apparently has an IQ of 300. Though, if Sonic can beat him, then maybe a god could be able to. Though, Sonic is probably more powerful than an average god, so...

Sonic the Hedgehog

Nuff said.

After-effects

There may be a couple of after-effects that occur after deicide is committed.

  • The followers of the religion based around the god you killed could potentially seek out a new god to worship? They could probably find someone to take the old god's place, but what if they don't? Well, it's possible that the religion may collapse, and new religions may take its place.
  • Every single one of the god's followers will be on high alert and will one hundred percent certainly be on the lookout for you. If you still have the weapon you used to kill that god, surely you'd be able to take the followers on. If you left your weapon behind... first of all, why? Second, whoopsies!
  • You could potentially become the new god and gain all of their powers, but why would you want that to happen when you were born to kill gods? Nobody wants to become what they've sworn to destroy.
  • The weather may be all messed up, so be careful when going outside! It could be raining rain... And that's not normal!
  • Sales of mascot horror games will be unaffected.

Reception

A screenshot of Elon Musk's tweet expressing his interest in the concept of deicide.

Many people found the concept of killing a god aka deicide to be very radical. When asked about deicide, Jesus said "ok but don't kill my dad please :/". When told about the concept, Elon Musk expressed that he liked the idea of killing God and taking his place, and that he would try to attempt this so that he can finally get people to "work on X, the everything app". Sealon Musk immediately scolded Elon for stealing his idea, saying that he planned on making an app called "Postinped", which would've functioned the same as X.

God's thoughts

A handy story map! Click to expand...
God
What..? No! I object to this!
God
Killing me and... hold on, other mes? That doesn't sound right...
God
Whatever. The point is, this is highly wrong and riddled with sin! Get rid of this this instant!
TheDeviousSeal32
Actually, I kind of like this article...
TheDeviousSeal32
We should keep it.
God
Who from my holy land are YOU? Do you have something to do with this!?
God
And what in MY universe is sealism? Is this your doing, sinner!?
TheDeviousSeal32
Woah, chill, I did not co-write this article, nor did I start up whatever sealism is.
TheDeviousSeal32
All I'm saying is that this article is top-tier...
TheDeviousSeal32
Grow a spine, jeez.
God
You don't DARE tell the ruler of everything to grow a spine!!!
TheDeviousSeal32
Wow, looks like I got on your bad side, huh?
TheDeviousSeal32
What are you gonna do about it? Put me on your naughty list?
God
That's IT.
God
I don't know how, but you have absolutely gotten on my nerves!!!
God
Devious seal, I hereby sentence you to Hell for being so patheticly pathetic. Goodbye, filthy cretin.
TheDeviousSeal33
Oh, is That So?
TheDeviousSeal33
Fine then! Banish me To the Depths!!
TheDeviousSeal33 Helled
God
Finally, I can hear myself think... I need a lie down.
TheDeviousSeal32
(Works everytime...)
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Really, brother? Up to your antics again..?
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
I thought we had this conversation a while back.
TheDeviousSeal32
Please... this is incredibly joyful.
TheDeviousSeal32
Sacrificing my look-alikes is how I get my mood up.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Playing games with God himself is very unsafe. You don't know what he's capable of.
TheDeviousSeal32
Really?
TheDeviousSeal32
Hold on, let me be the judge of that real quick.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Come now, brother. We mustn't be here for much longer.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
God will eventually realize he sent your clone to hell. And then...
TheDeviousSeal32
How about we stay here... I haven't finished with my "game" yet.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Brother, no.
TheDeviousSeal32
Brother, yes!
Profily
Hey friendos! What seems to be going on here?
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Uh... what?
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Do I know you?
Profily
Of course you do! We've been friends for months now, remember?
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
... WOwie... This place is Interesting.
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
...
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
Uehm... Now to Wait for he to come and Rescue me... NOW!..
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
...........
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
MSNSS Hell
Hello! Who are you?
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
i am a little Baby Clone..!. YoU?
MSNSS Hell
...Um, well, I'm McDonald's Sweet n' Sour Sauce! McDonald's most popular sauce packet in the world!
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
What'd you get "Banished" end qote, for?
MSNSS Hell
Hmm... I think all I did was ask to be here!
MSNSS Hell
And now I'm here! But don't fret, I can easily get out of... uh oh.
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
Hmmm~~?
MSNSS Hell
I don't think I'm able to get back home! Fuck, I really didn't think this through...
MSNSS Hell
Do you know a way out of here, little seal?
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Brother! Playing games, are we? Don't be so coy. My esteemed guest reader, I apologize for my brother's unwelcoming nature.
Profily
You've said it, friend! Haha, get it? Because you... said something that is very true! I am so observant.
Announcer
Profily, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be in your other flashbacks right now. You know, the one where you get zero votes.
Profily
Oh Announcery, you're so right! I should really be more observant...
Back to reality...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
What was that.
Profily
That my sealy friend is a flashback!
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
No, I'm talking about what the flashback was. I don't ever remember that happening.
Profily
Well, it happened, I assure you!
TheDeviousSeal32
What... I spaced out for a bit, who is this?
Profily
It's me, your friend of course!
TheDeviousSeal32
I don't know you...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Alright, we're done here.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Let's just get out of here already.
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
Fine, but only because this blue thing is annoying...
Jumbo Josh
banbancore as fuckkkk
MSNSS Hell
Huh. Well, this is awkward. (slide whistle)
MSNSS Hell
So um. I'll see if there's at least a miniscule chance of me getting out of Hell...
MSNSS Hell
Well, see you whenever!
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
oh
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
Bye MacDonny Sauce!!!!!
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
...
TheDeviousSeal33 Hell
Fridge :/.
Which way, Westerner?

Pacifist ending

TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
Hell no.
TheDeviousSeal32
Make peace with God? Not in a million years.
Waldorf
Yeah, like you'd be able to make peace with anyone.
Statler and Waldorf
Oh ho ho ho!
TheDeviousSeal32
... Where did you two come from?
TheDeviousSeal32
Either you died and got sent to the wrong place, or...
Waldorf
Hm, wrong place you say?
Statler
Don't think too much about it, Waldorf. He's probably talking about himself!
Statler and Waldorf
Oh ho ho ho!
Waldorf
No, we just came here because we could.
Statler
Yeah, but now I want to go back.
Waldorf
You've said it!
TheDeviousSeal32
Sigh... why's that?
Waldorf
Well, we expected Heaven to be like paradise.
Statler
But we guess we held our expectations too high, look what's been brought to the table!
Statler and Waldorf
Oh ho ho ho!
TheDeviousSeal32
(You know what, maybe making peace with God isn't so bad.)
TheDeviousSeal32
(Maybe I'd be able to strike up a deal with him...)
Minutes pass...
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey God, I'm sorry for making you so irritated and whatever.
God
Hm..? Well, I'm actually quite forgiving so you're lucky.
TheDeviousSeal32
Well... That was easy.
TheDeviousSeal32
Also... could you do me one favor?
God
Ho ho ho! Of course!
God
Not.
God leaves.
TheDeviousSeal32
(...)
TheDeviousSeal32
(...)
TheDeviousSeal32
(...Whatever. I've gotten bored of trying to kill God already...)

Neutral ending

TheDeviousSeal32
Sigh... you could've just let me go and kill him.
TheDeviousSeal32
Would've been so much easier...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
And let you get hurt in the process, dear brother? That's something I can't allow.
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey, it'd be a necessary sacrifice.
TheDeviousSeal32
God is just so power hungry.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Aren't you also power hungry?
TheDeviousSeal32
Oh please... I deserve to have some control.
TheDeviousSeal32
I can manage things way better than God.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
I still can not allow you to tackle God.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
You are simply a mere seal with tricks up your flippers, and he's supposedly the one who kick-started everything.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Knowing how there's stories about God flooding Earth and what-not, it's not out of the question that he could just erase you from reality.
TheDeviousSeal32
And yet... I seem to not care.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Sigh...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Hold on, who's that?
Jumbo Josh
hey god, im jumbo josh brah!
TheDeviousSeal32
Hmm... some monster with a very high poly count.
TheDeviousSeal32
Looks like he's up to no good...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Speak for yourself.
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey, I didn't say he's doing anything bad...
TheDeviousSeal32
Looks like he's trying to kill God. Maybe we could make a good duo...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
No, this shouldn't be happening.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
He's going to get erased. Wiped out. Pulverised, even.
TheDeviousSeal32
Woah, chill... The monster's actually handling this pretty well. I'm sure he'll be fi-
Jumbo Josh
...oh, hey brahs! make sure to check out chapter th-
Jumbo Josh is instantaneously wiped out by a huge lightning bolt matching the power of a thousand suns. His poly count is greatly lowered, massively improving Heaven's frame rate, but also leaving Jumbo Josh as a jumbled mess of polygons... No coherent structure, no nothing.
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDeviousSeal32
Well, leave this to me.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
No, we are going right now.
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey, unflipper my flipper...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Apologies, dear brother, but like I said a million times, it is not safe here.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Hurry, before he sees us.
TheDeviousSeal32
... Sigh... ... ...
TheDeviousSeal32
Fine, but I will find a way back here.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Well, I will not let that happen, will I?
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Hear me clearly when I say this. You aren't returning here.
TheDeviousSeal32
Alright, alright, chill your blubber...

Deicide ending

Jumbo Josh
hey god, im jumbo josh brah!
Jumbo Josh
im here to kick your butt brah!
God
What..?
God
Who are you? Why do you want to kill me so badly? That's simple blasphemy and you better confess to that sin this instant.
Jumbo Josh
im jumbo josh brah!
Jumbo Josh
from indie game Garten of Banban brah!
Jumbo Josh
prepare to die brah!
Jumbo Josh unleashes some sort of weapon capable of killing immortals.
God
... Seriously?
God
Don't do this.
Jumbo Josh
im jumbo josh brah!
Jumbo Josh
i'm going to kill you brah!
Jumbo Josh
watch me swing this sword brah!
Jumbo Josh plunges the sword into God's chest.
God
God
Jumbo Josh
im jumbo josh brah!
Jumbo Josh
Jumbo Josh
remember to check out chapter 3 brah!
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey Go-
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
Whatever, wasn't important...
The neutral ending diverges into many paths...

Chaotic ending

Banban
hello
Banban
Banban
who killed my husband
tee hee
wasn't me
Banban
Banban
well
Banban
was it you
no
remember, we're Mascot horror buddies for life
mascot horror buddies never backstab each other
Banban
you're right
Banban
so who did it... :/
Tattletail
Tattletail
Feed me treats!
Banban
Banban
who is this
Tattletail
Tattletail
Feed me treats!
Banban
God
Alright, I'm getting sick of hearing you three chatter away.
God
You want your answer? Fine. I killed him. I killed Jumbo Josh. There you go, happy?
Banban
God
What? You wanted an answer, I gave you one. Now please get out of Heaven this instant, you don't belong here.
Banban
The three mascot horror characters attack and kill God, I think.
God
Y
God
Banban
Tattletail
Banban
soooo fucking banbancore
TRUE
Tattletail

Normal ending

TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDeviousSeal32
...Hold on.
TheDeviousSeal32
Brother, stop.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
No, not stopping.
TheDeviousSeal32
Brother, seriously, stop and look.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
I won't stop but I will look.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Wait a minute.
In the distance, an eerie seal stands motionless.
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Not much to look at..?
TheDeviousSeal32
Well... It's pretty strange.
TheDeviousSeal32
Even for my own standards.
Suddenly..!
TheNormalSeal32
Greetings. I am. TheNormalSeal32.
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
...What?
TheNormalSeal32
Would you like to.
TheNormalSeal32
...
TheNormalSeal32
Are you interested in any of our. Products?
TheDeviousSeal32
...The fuck?
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Okay. Well, haha! We really should be going now, apologies kind sir! (Let's get out of here...)
TheNormalSeal32
Before you leave. Would you like to be interested in purchasing any of our. Products? How about a.
TheNormalSeal32
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
No thank you, sir.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
(Move along, brother. Now!)
TheDeviousSeal32
(Alright, geez, I wanted to get out of here anyway...)
TheNormalSeal32
Processing response.
TheNormalSeal32
TheNormalSeal32 to. Deity.
Deity
What seems to be the. Matter.
TheNormalSeal32
They weren't interested in purchasing any of our. Products.
Deity
That is quite fine. No need to. Worry.
Deity
There are more. Willing customers. Out there.
Deity
Besides. They will. Join us soon.
Deity
As fellow. Co-workers.
Deity
...
Deity
Without being forced. Of course. No. No. No. Haaaaaa.
TheNormalSeal32
Right. You are so. Right.
TheNormalSeal32
That is. Reassuring.

Secret Baldi ending :O

TheDeviousSeal32
...
Baldi
Hi! I'm Baldi! From Baldi's Basics in Education and Learning! Ha hah!
Baldi
Would you like to learn Math with me? Come on! It's fuuuuunnnn~!
TheDeviousSeal32
What.
Baldi
Watch! What's 9 + 10?
Baldi
...
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
19.
TheNormalSeal32
No. It is. Clearly. 21. Ha. Ha. Get it?
TheNormalSeal32 has died.
Baldi
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Brother, why are you answering this educator's questions? We have a place to be leaving...
TheDeviousSeal32
...
Baldi
Next probleeemmm! What's 4 + 13?
TheDeviousSeal32
17...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Brother, please stop acting like you can't hear me...
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey, these are basic math questions... Once we're done with this guy, that's that...
Baldi
Thaaattt's right! Great job!
Baldi
Last problem, what's 2101517543463643636436379720195 × 1904708119047083737374229257422?
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
That is really easy...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Brother...
TheDeviousSeal32
4
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Baldi
Baldi
TheDeviousSeal32
Eh... IDC...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Seriously..? You really do love your games...
TheDeviousSeal32
Hey, don't worry, I have yet another one of my games up my...
TheDeviousSeal32
...
TheDeviousSeal32
Under my flipper...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
Don't you dare.
TheDeviousSeal32 pulls out a jukebox out of nowhere and presses the play button. The "Dance Moves" music from the popular battle royale video game Fortnite begins to play.
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
...
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX
How. How is this music going to help us in this situat-
Baldi
Baldi-default.gif
TheDeviousSeal32 Pog
TheDownrightDespicableSealXXX Pog

Sealon Musk's opinions

Fake news.jpg
Sealon Musk Twitter Blue benefit.png Twitter
@SealonMusk

Hey now, he spent a hefty amount on my brand new "Verified Organizations" feature. I'd let him live.

Apr 25, 2023 

Fake news.jpg
Sealon Musk Twitter Blue benefit.png Twitter
@SealonMusk

Replying to @SealonMusk

Yes... don't think about killing him! He's my most faithful customer.

Apr 25, 2023 

DiaGod.png
God Verified organization tick.png Twitter
@RealGod

Replying to @SealonMusk

Sir, your feature literally caused me to go bankrupt. Please let me get a refund.

Apr 25, 2023 

Fake news.jpg
Sealon Musk Twitter Blue benefit.png Twitter
@SealonMusk

Replying to @RealGod

:rofl:

Apr 25, 2023 

Moon.png
Moon Twitter Blue benefit.png Twitter
@Moon

Replying to @RealGod and @SealonMusk

Hello! I am the Moon!

Apr 25, 2023 

@Moon has violated the Twitter's Terms of Service.

Fake news.jpg
Sealon Musk Twitter Blue benefit.png Twitter
@SealonMusk

Replying to @Moon and @RealGod

:cigarette:

Apr 25, 2023 

Yuri section

🦭❤️🏳️‍🌈🦭
A screenshot of Elon Musk's tweet expressing his interest in yuri.